We have different ways of facing ours fears, worries and anxieties. Others dwell in it for days while others masked them with a happy face that one can never tell that they’re close to committing suicide.
One of my favorite bloggers, Verns, wrote about having a "day off" of being optimistic and gay. Just a day in a month she would feel all her worries. Her post inspired me to write about my way of facing them.
In a day I have this 10-minute break to feel my worries and fears. Every night before I speak with my Master I succumb to these feelings. Mostly I cry about being not good enough (this is my greatest fear according to Tickle), I cry about the past and what could have beens. I cry about Mama’s struggle against diabetes and Papa’s smoker’s cough that is getting worse everyday. I also cry about my fear of growing old alone. I cry about others’ harsh perceptions of me. if i don't get to have my daily cry, my crying time the following day usually takes more than 10 minutes...(i know its weird but thats true...wala kaming lahing baliw kung saka sakali ako pa lang :P)
The 10-minute crying spell is not intentional though. It is more of a habit that I have adopted over time. It started a few years back when I was heart broken and it hurt so bad and I wanted to regulate my crying spell! At that time, when I feel like crying about it I give myself just 10 minutes to cry then I would get back to what I was doing.
I find my “10-minute moments” therapeutic. It enables me to step back and assess my life before I go on.
6 comments:
Zelle we have so much in common when it comes to this. This also started when I underwent that bad break-up. Somehow it crashed me but like what I've said...I'm all glued back now :)
Hey at least we have our habit of "crying" :) iba-iba nga lang tayo ng schedule hehe
Cheers to both of us!
btw you are also one of my favorite bloggers...I like reading posts na personalized :)
:) thanks girl!
oo nga iba lang ng sched. ikaw minsanan ako tingi tingi! hehehe
Hazel, it's the spice of life, isn't it.. It's not normal if you're merry all the time.. ang buhay parang gulong ng palad, di ba? (I use to love that tv soap, maybe you weren't born then, when it was shown ).
Hope you feel better soon :-)
Naku, pareho pala kayo ni Verns. :) Whenever I feel depressed, I just think of it as something that balances my life. Low points are as important as high points, because they both develop our characters.
Pining, yup parang gulong ng palad talaga! hey..naabutan ko yun..favorite yun ni mama...kaya ko pang kantahan ang theme song! :D
kathy, i agree! low and high points make us stronger and better individuals!
Post a Comment